Get to Know Me

I want to start off my first blog with a little "Get To Know Me" Post. I have a lot that I want to share with other moms out there but understand you have to get to know someone before even wanting to take somebody's tips or advice. As for me, I want to know who I am about to take advice from or whom I am reading about.

I am a young mom (just turned 28 on March 27th) living in Malibu, California. I am definitely not going to get into major detail to bore you =) but I have a lot more experience then most gals my age and that is why most of my friends now are mostly in their early to mid thirties. I don't think age really matters. It is what you live, learn, experience, and take from your journey and where you are at in your own life.

I have made some mistakes that took me down a path that was extremely difficult but I would never change a thing. My past is who makes me into what I am and still trying to be, gave me my girls, led me to finding my 2nd husband(who took in my younger daughter Sophia and accepted her as his own), and has made me strong. I don't think there is anything that could get in my way(besides death of a family member) that would break me cause I have seen the worst behind me. I am a fiesty, determined, strong-willed, woman who doesn't like being wrong but will admit when I am! I am learning that being strong and having good character is admitting you are wrong and seeing what you can do to change things that get in your way of being a better mother, daughter, wife, and friend. I used to think I was weak when I kept failing but now I am seeing that being able to recognize when I do fall is the biggest strength of all.

Another big thing that I am learning is to accept me for me and realize that you can change the negative without trying to change who you are. I can sometimes be so hard on myself and be my own worst enemy! I am a southern girl, raised in Nasvhille, Tn, so living in Los Angeles(been here four years now) is extremely hard. I suppose it is hard anywhere being a woman and being challenged by today's society and the need to look good and have the next best thing but it is EXTREMELY hard out here. I have found myself coming from having enough to be thankful for to having too much! I sometimes get really caught up in my surroundings. I need more strength to be content. Sounds horrible, I know, but I am realizing it and taking small steps to being who I want to be. Sometimes I call Los Angeles, "LA LA LAND" and refer to it as a place where people don't have realistic expectations. It is world of make believe to me. Sometimes I want to grab the lady next to me in the coffee shop with the Louis Vuitton, toy dog, and massive amount of plastic surgery, and say, "Come one, lady! Life it so much more!! HELLO! Wake up!!". At the same time I find myself then looking at myself and realizing that I have nice bags, a freakin 2.2 million dollar home in Malibu(not much for "LA" but so much more than I ever dreamed), an extremely nice car, and so many materialistic bullshit things that mean nothing at the end of the day. I find myself comparing my life to friends close to me and why my house isn't as big or why I don't have the new chanel bag they have yet! Back when I was living the southern life, I was focused on other things. I guess the difference between me and coffee shop lady is that I do know reality and what is most important and I am taking notice to when I am getting caught up? I am trying to teach my children that these "things" don't make us happy but love and learning through this thing called "life" is what the meaning of life is. I want my daughters to have nice things but i want them to have a happy heart more than anything. Through God's grace and through my eagerness to grow as a mom and woman, I pray for strength to make it in this extremely tough world. We all experience DIFFERENT weakness and hardships. I am a "Grass is always greener on the other side" woman so that is the weakness I am working on. I have always been that way so i am trying to learn to appreciate what I have and see that I have so much more than most would dream for.

God is good. I am a spiritual person that loves God, believes in His miracles and love for us yet at the same time I am not caught up in "religion" and being "religious". I believe that sometimes "religion" takes away from spirituality and the true meaning and purpose of God. I grew up around "religion" and know it can be so hypocritical and that's what draws people away rather than closer. A stranger or friend should see your heart through knowing you and not you preaching it through threatening technique(I'm not saying you shouldn't speak and be proud... talking about something different). That's my belief and wanted to share to end me post. Thank you God for life, blessings, and for second chances when we fall!

This is my daily prayer:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next. Amen.